I'm ranting, venting, whatever. I'm stressed and I need to get it out. Read, don't read. Comment, don't comment. Doesn't matter. This is for me.
College is testing me... I'm still adjusting. The past two day have sucked, unbelievably sucked. Monday and Tuesday were great. I hope tomorrow is better. How am I dealing with stress? Horribly! It's not even all school. It's the million other things on top of school. Plus emotions I simply don't have the time to sort through. It's no wonder I'm not sleeping well, grinding my teeth, clenching my jaw, and having headaches.
I just keep telling myself I'm still adjusting. I'll get used to things in a little while. Then I'll be more comfortable here. Until then I guess I fail at life.
I did find something that made me happy today, though. There's a girl here who's from Keene. Someone besides me and my cousin who knows where and what my town is! It makes me want to go be her best friend. Too bad I'm too shy and dysfunctional at the moment. Damn, I really just don't know how to make friends.
In a way it's totally not fair, not only do you have to get used to a new school you are doing so completely on your own for the first time. That's HUGE! I didn't. I wussed out and went to school and lived at home when I went to university. You are doing everything on your own which you should get major recognition for Tori. I personally am super proud of you. It must be overwhelming and you're still doing it. The beginning is the hardest part. You will get your groove and make friends. How could you not? You are so awesome! Man, I have got to stop breaking my own rules!
ReplyDeleteThat's not a fail. You're just in a slump. College is a major adjustment. My son hated it, my daughter loved it. It's not the same for everyone.
ReplyDeleteYou'll get there but it does take time.
You're not failing. You're simply adjusting, transitioning. I know it's hard to see, but believe me, so many others are feeling exactly like you are.
ReplyDeleteHang in there Tori, it's a hell of a change but things WILL balance out.
((hugs of support))