Thursday night I got some wonderful news that really made my week. Some of my friends had created a facebook group called House of Flair. I first met this amazing group of friends when I was about 13 and playing on Neopets. When we got bored with that website we tried to move the HoF group. But members dwindled, people got busy, and even though we friended each other of facebook we all pretty much stopped talking. We all should have thought of a facebook group sooner, but I'm just glad someone did! I've been missing the fun we used to have, even if it was only through online discussions. They helped me to harness the creativity I have. When we began talking again I instantly felt a new wave of inspiration hit me. I think it's the beginning of a wonderful change.
That night, I wrote this poem.
It gleams around every corner;
A firefly glowing, a bumblebee buzzing.
The simple things in life that keep you going.
I never thought I really had it,
So I never thought I could really miss it.
Until I did.
One day it just seemed to up and leave me.
I was on the beach high and dry,
All dressed up with no place to go.
I struggled to find it.
It seemed to me that I never would.
But I was wrong.
Because it’s bigger than a dinosaur!
It’s everywhere and nowhere.
It’s nothing and everything.
I found it at last when I realized it was never really gone.
It was inside and outside.
I’ve always had it,
Because that’s just who I am.
My change of mental status is also provoking outward change. I'm leaving for college in 5 short months, so I knew this was coming. I doubt I could start a new chapter of my life without the stress and awkwardness of change. I am preparing myself mentally for getting my license and a real job. I am going to get the junky car my grandpa gave me fixed up. I am going to go through my clothes and get rid of the things I don't wear, then find some new clothes. I am going to get the haircut I've been wanting to get for months.
It's all going to happen, but today is just another busy day off to a bad start. I was woken up early by the annoying bird flying repeatedly into my window, my parents won't stop bickering over stupid stuff, and I'll be babysitting the sweetest, but most active, two-year-old in the world for most of the day. Not to mention I started coming down with a cold yesterday. Ah well, Rome wasn't built in a day, and I guess change comes slowly.