Monday, February 16, 2009


In spite of all my complaining to people that I never get to go out and do the things normal teens do, I now realize WHY that is. I'm not programmed for it. Other things are just more important in my life than staying up late, then getting up early the next day and being so grumpy that I bite people's heads off at the slightest irritation.

This past week I was just trying to do too much. I had homework in every class, a flower sale to help plan, a dance to help with, then friends I felt obligated to hang out with. I was off my normal sleep schedule, and I don't deal with that well. xD I missed out on focusing my attention on the things I find important. They might not be the things normal teenagers find important, but I think I'd rather embrace this oddity about myself than work against it. I like doing yoga, meditating, reading, learning about myself, and thinking about my path. The thing is- all work and no play makes Tori a dull, unhappy, girl with no friends. I have them, and I love doing things with them, I just can't keep up half the time!

I can't wait until Friday. I'll be heading for Disney World! I need this vacation. My body was sending me signals all last week to slow down, and, even though I heard them, I just kept ignoring them. No more! I need to sit and think about what I am willing to do if this keeps happening. What will I be willing to change or give up? I'm not sure yet. All I know is last week was not a happy one, and I don't need more like it. I should probably stop procrastinating on my homework and go do it now. xP


  1. What is a "normal" teenager? What is a "normal" adult? We are all different, and that's a wonderful thing. What you have that a lot of adults don't is self-knowledge. Something most rare. :)

  2. If I were more like you when I was a teen Tori, I'd probably have had an authentic life full of things I love to do, a long time ago instead of just now. You sound very true to yourself and I think that's a much tougher cross to bear in your teen years than at any other time. Kudos!

  3. omg, honey, be THANKFUL you're not a "normal" teenager! (if teenagers can even be considered normal...)

    my family makes fun of the "normal" ones. we like abnormal! =)

  4. Tori - you blow my mind when you write stuff like this. You are wise beyond your years.
    Live each day and do what you can without burning yourself out. I think you're very enlightened and will make the best choices for yourself.
    Hooray Disneyland !!!!

  5. listen to your body. listen to that inner wise woman that we all have... you are so fortunate to have discoverd her at 18!! Your inner wise woman will never, ever let you down.. and remember be true to yourself. don't try to be like others. Lord, you are an amazing woman. so very wise at such an early age. xoxo